Often, people feel like they have to have one hair type, and one hair type only. I’m not really sure why we have this tendency to categorize our hair in a single way. It’s very common for people to have multiple hair textures. If your hair is wavy in spots but straight in spots, then you have some straight hair and some wavy hair! Nature. Sun Damage. The outer layer of hair is often more damaged by the sun. Transition Phase. Sometimes it happens when hair is undergoing changes due to hormonal differences (such as in preteens, pregnant, postpartum, or menopausal women).
Moisture Differences. Hair near the neck sometimes curls up tighter because the hair there is often finer and may be more sweaty/oily which results in it being better moisturized than the top layer. Product Build Up. Hard Water Build Up. Shower Head Damage. Heat Damage. The outer layer can suffer more heat damage. Often when curling or straightening our hair, we’re really particular about getting the top layer to look ‘perfect’ because it’s the most visible. This can mean running the hair straightener over sections of hair more times on the top vs the bottom, or re-curling locks of hair more on top than underneath.
When you have a natural difference in curl pattern, it’s unlikely to be able to get your hair to be perfectly identical when styling. If you haven’t been using hair stylers with hold (like gel or mousse), you may find that if you switch to using a styler when your hair is wet, it’ll help the straight layer dry more wavy curly and will match the underlayer more. If you’ve already been styling your hair wavy with a styling product with hold but still find that your top layer is straight while the underside is wavy, giving extra TLC to the top layer can help really maximize its wavy potential. Diffuse the outer layer first so it dries fastest.
If your outer layer is different because it is more damaged, you may be able to get more cohesive hair if you work to reduce how much damage is happening to the outer layer. This will be a longterm solution as it’ll require being gentle on your hair and letting the old damage grow out. Use UV protecting hair products to reduce damage. This will require a longterm commitment rather than creating sudden results.
Let’s be honest here. I’ll bet you opened this post because your curls are driving you absolutely crazy. Maybe you used to have gorgeous spirals that would last for days and days, and now they fall flat before lunchtime. I get it. This is a problem that I have also struggled with since I ditched the dye 10 years ago. Things have changed, and I’ve learned quite a bit along the way. If you could see my hair every single day, you would realize that my hair is not perfect. By the end of this, you’ll have some real methods to try. Read on to find out what my number one issue was, and I hope the last tip helps you the most.
Disclosure: The product links in this post may be affiliate links. As an Affiliate, I earn from qualifying purchases, at no additional cost to you. As counterintuitive as it may sound, ditching the dye can contribute to changes in your curl pattern. Dye damages all hair, and some hair types benefit from the damage. When I dyed my hair, the few days and weeks after I had dyed it, my curls were at their best. Hormones control the shape of the follicle. The follicle controls the curl pattern. As estrogen levels drop during menopause, testosterone binds to the receptors in the follicle, causing it to become straighter or curlier over time. The solution is to check with your doctor and see if you have some hormone imbalances that can medically be addressed.
Your sex hormones are one thing, but remember thyroid and insulin are also hormones. Like I mentioned earlier, I had a double whammy. I ditched the dye at the very same time that I had a complete hysterectomy. Look at your prepubescent hair. If you can, find pictures of yourself before you went through puberty. The theory holds, whatever your hair looked like before puberty, it’s likely it will look the same after you finish menopause because the hormone levels will be somewhat similar.
This may seem obvious. However, when you have long hair it’s easy for it to get too long without you even realizing it. Having long hair myself, I can tell you it happens. I will go for a little while and then all of a sudden, I’m wondering, “What is going on with my hair? Solution: Get a haircut and try some long layers or a curl-by-curl cut. If you have the right stylist, I highly recommend that you evaluate what’s going on with the lengths of your hair and if it’s possible that the weight of the hair is pulling out the curl pattern.
All curly hair is dry. NOPE, that’s a myth. All silver hair is dry. Because of these two myths, I think that a lot of people are using way too much conditioner or the wrong kind of conditioner for their hair type. It doesn’t matter what color your hair is, and it doesn’t matter what pattern your hair is. Water softener reality: Water softeners use conditioning agents to soften the water, and those conditioning agents will be conditioning your hair. Humidity factor: If you live in a humid climate and you’re adding too much conditioner or the wrong type, it could just be weighing your hair down because there’s already so much moisture in the air. The solution is NOT don’t use conditioner. It is about finding the right conditioner for your hair type. You may need something lightweight with no oils, maybe a little bit of protein, or more water when you’re using conditioner. For instance, if you have a favorite conditioner, try to water it down a little bit instead of using more product.
They’re not necessarily evil or bad and you don’t need to avoid them altogether, but you want to make sure that you’re using them in moderation. A lot of curly-specific products contain oils, and I’ve included this with silicones because they do the same thing. They coat the hair. They create a beautiful barrier against humidity - that’s valuable. Heavy butters like coconut oil, shea butter, and cocoa butter are really big culprits here because they are coating and they’re molecularly heavy. My best advice for using silicones and oils is to use them as a finishing product. My entire lineup contains very few oils, and no silicones in my shampoo, conditioner, leave-in, or gel.
What to look for: Water-soluble and shampoo-soluble silicones. Don’t use silicones at all if you are co-washing your hair and not using shampoo. Chances are good if you are not clarifying your hair at all, your curls are suffering. Here’s a little test I like to do: If you have frizz and you have a lack of curl pattern, clarify your hair. If it gets frizzier, you need a better conditioner and a better hold product. If you have hard water, you need a clarifying shampoo that has chelating ingredients that break up the hard water deposits.
I have an important message…listen to me on this one: NO HOLD MEANS - NO HOLD! If you aren’t setting that curl with some sort of product that can lock it into place, it’s not going to last. Light to medium hold products are usually not enough. The Truth About Mousse: I know many of us grew up in the 80s and 90s with the wet look and we were using that fabulous Aussie mousse that locked it in and gave us that solid curl for days. That mousse is no longer on the market, and I have yet to find one that competed with it. Curl Cream Reality Check: Using only a curl cream can be a problem. Curl creams are not usually designed for hold. They’re designed to encourage the curl, and in some cases, they can be very weighty and pull the curl out. The solution: Use hard hold or firm hold gels. You can layer gels over your creams or your leave-ins to help soften your hair. If you’re applying them on soaking wet hair, you won’t get that hard crunchy hair that you think you will. These gels create a protective barrier and they add structure to the curl. Don’t be scared of the crunch. Applying your products to damp hair will disrupt your curl pattern, cause frizz, and shorten the curl longevity.
The wet hair rule is simply applying your products to wet or soaking wet hair to help evenly distribute the products. It helps to make sure that you are locking in that curl family. If you’re trying to apply your leave-ins, mousses, or gels on damp hair, you can’t get a defined long-lasting look. You won’t get those clumps together. If you’re going for pure volume, damp hair might be the way to go.
The Touch Factor: The more you touch your hair before it’s 100% dry, the more likely you’re going to cause frizz and break up your curl families. The worst kind of touching it is scrunching the curls with your towel, scrunching in products on damp hair, and scrunching it with your diffuser.
Sectioning Matters: The more hair you have, the more sections you need. I have fine thin hair, so I only section my hair into three sections - the two sides and the back section. I focus on the back section a little differently because that curl is slightly different than the rest of my hair. The longer your hair is wet, the more elongated your curl will be. If you’re using a microfiber towel and you have low porosity hair, you’re probably not getting enough water out of your hair. I suggest that microfiber towels be used on higher porosity or quick-drying hair types. Plopping: If you haven’t learned how to plop your hair, now’s the time to learn.
The air-drying problem: There are cons to air-drying your hair. This was one of my number one culprits and issues. I had air-dried my hair for 20 years because of the Curly Girl Method “no heat” rule. I never touched my hair with heat, and that became a detriment to my curly silver hair. I’m not against air-drying, far from it, I am writing this while my hair is air-drying. It is nearly 100°F and a very dry day so it will dry relatively quickly. Long Hair Diffusing Technique: Because the length and weight of my hair will elongate my curls; I plop my hair onto the counter while drying. I take it straight out of the plop; I flip my head over and pool my curls onto the towel on the counter. Then I lay the dryer on the counter, I move it around my hair in sections, I hover diffuse to dry it, once I come upright I hover diffuse for a few more minutes.
Don’t touch with the diffuser: Back to the touching issue…if you’re touching your hair with the diffuser, you’re breaking up those curl families and creating more frizz. Let it cool and dry completely: Let your hair cool and let it completely dry 100% of the way before you touch it. Pro Tip: sleep in your cast, don’t break it up and you might get a better chance at second day curls.
You may have had some of these issues that I’ve discussed. You may have had all of these issues. What that means now, it might be time for you to accept that your curls have changed. It doesn’t mean that it’s bad. It doesn’t mean that it’s ugly. It doesn’t mean that there’s anything wrong with it. You may have to adjust your curl-scope and learn to accept what is. I can get my hair to look like I want for about 24 hours and most of the time it will look completely different after I have slept on it. If I’m lucky, I’ll still have enough curl to put it in a cute curly ponytail. Accepting what we have is so much better than chasing the perfect curl cream or gel or the perfect application method because acceptance is free. You may have one of these issues or all of these issues. Experiment, you can adjust for one thing, two things, three things, or all the things and see what happens. I do suggest you try one at a time so you can see how that one change performs for you. If it goes well, keep it and try another. If it doesn’t, skip to the next change. Take notes. Adjust your curl-scope - Work with what you have. Thank you for reading. Please feel free to share.
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